Thursday, July 22, 2010
Thursday
I went for the beta this morning and it came back negative. I'm truly surprised for a number of reasons but mainly due to the lack of spotting which I have become accustomed to. I know this is thanks to the Utroge.stan, but then I don't understand what went wrong. If the timing was perfect, the sperm good, proges.terone levels well maintained, what is it, whats going wrong?? I can't take this disappointment every time, its heart breaking. I'm guttered and pissed off. I've emailed my FS with a bunch of questions, so we'll see what he comes back with.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Tuesday
We're in our second week of the TWW and there's not much to report. The first week was just ridiculous, it dragged on and on. I swear I was counting the minutes as they dragged by.
Proges.terone is definitely not on my favourites list. That stuff is nasty! It's so messy, I had no idea it would be this gross. It's given a few side effects namely hunger and slight constant cramping. Other than that its ok.
I'm supposed to go for a beta on Thursday but I might just wait a few days and see what happens. I don't want to spend any money unnecessarily but I'm also so eager to know. We'll see what happens but I'll probably wait.
Proges.terone is definitely not on my favourites list. That stuff is nasty! It's so messy, I had no idea it would be this gross. It's given a few side effects namely hunger and slight constant cramping. Other than that its ok.
I'm supposed to go for a beta on Thursday but I might just wait a few days and see what happens. I don't want to spend any money unnecessarily but I'm also so eager to know. We'll see what happens but I'll probably wait.
Thursday, July 8, 2010
Choc-Chip Crunchies
I've been wanting to make these for weeks now so tonight I finally made them. The recipe is my gran's and its so delisious! You have to try them.
Choc-Chip Crunchies
1 cup Butter
15ml Golden Syrup
2 cups Rolled Oats
2/3 cup Dessicated Coconut
2/3 cup Choc Chips
1 cup Flour
1/2 tsp Baking Soda
Preheat oven to 170°C. Melt butter and syrup, add remaining ingredients and thoroughly combine. Press mixture into a square 23 x 23cm baking tin and bake for 30 min. Don't over bake as it will crumble.
Choc-Chip Crunchies
1 cup Butter
15ml Golden Syrup
2 cups Rolled Oats
2/3 cup Dessicated Coconut
2/3 cup Choc Chips
1 cup Flour
1/2 tsp Baking Soda
Preheat oven to 170°C. Melt butter and syrup, add remaining ingredients and thoroughly combine. Press mixture into a square 23 x 23cm baking tin and bake for 30 min. Don't over bake as it will crumble.
Thursday
IUI # 2 done! After a mini breakdown last night with loads of tears I must've looked like I'd been punched in the face this morning with my hugely swollen eyes. The nurses were super sweet and even the previously-mean-accounts-woman made a special effort to be nice to me. After the IUI we went home, N went to the dentist and I got into bed (it was so cold this morning, so bed was the perfect place) and watched some TV before heading off to work at 12:00. The rest of the day was bleh until my BFF called, we chatted for ages and although she lifted my spirits I was still left with this "out of sorts" feeling. But as they say - this too shall pass.
I went to the pharmacy to get my proges.terone afterwards. They gave me the Utro.gestan which is supposed to be a bit better than the other one but they're weird cos they're little balls, like really little (like an Astro - for the South African readers). N and I just looked at these little things and we were like huh?! I know they need to be inserted up "there" but they're so little its like they'll get lost on the way.
Ahhh a glass of wine would go down so well now!
I went to the pharmacy to get my proges.terone afterwards. They gave me the Utro.gestan which is supposed to be a bit better than the other one but they're weird cos they're little balls, like really little (like an Astro - for the South African readers). N and I just looked at these little things and we were like huh?! I know they need to be inserted up "there" but they're so little its like they'll get lost on the way.
Ahhh a glass of wine would go down so well now!
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
Wednesday
IUI # 1 went well. My doctor did it which was good, he's so much more gentle than the others. We stopped for a quick breakfast then went back home. N went to work and I went to my Acupuncture appointment about 45 min away with all our lovely traffic.
The appointment was definitely bittersweet. It started with me giving her our basic TTC back ground. She asked some questions like was I having trouble sleeping, which has been a long standing problem for me. We chatted a bit more then I did this thing where I had to put my hands and bare feet on four metal pad things and two disks on my head attached to wires which in turn was attached to her PC. This was some sort of scan that had something to do with electrical impulses. From this she could pick up anything that wasn't quite right in my body.
The first things she picked up was kidney troubles. She said I was drinking far too little water and was probably dehydrated. Which is so true, I haven't been drinking nearly enough water / liquid for weeks. She noted various levels of certain things and asked me questions:
Do I get angry easily?
Do I get irritated easily?
Do I feel sad?
Do I feel like I've lost my security?
I couldn't believe it! She said all these things, especially the anger, is so built up in me. She asked what I worry about, I told her about my mom and then I mentioned about my dad passing away in the car with me while I drove him to the hospital. And just like that she knew where everything was coming from. She asked if I had had counseling after my dads passing, which I did, but we both agreed that it didn't help all that much (although I did feel a bit better talking about it at the time). My dad was my security, I always knew that if anything happened he would be there for me. That's the bitter part, the talking about him, I still can't talk about what happened that night, sometimes I think about it and it feels like I can't breath and I just pray so hard that that feeling goes away and that my memory of that night fades. All this time I've known that I wasn't the same person as I was before he died but I didn't think it had effected me to this extent.
She said my mind is like a hamster in his wheel, just running like crazy all day. I worry a lot about everything and she picked it up. She also picked up that my breathing is very shallow.
She encouraged me to do yoga, meditation & visualization and breathing exercises to help ease my mind and put me in a better place.
After all that it was time for the needles. I lay down while she inserted needles into my forehead, wrists, stomach, legs and ankles. It was a quick little prick which wasn't painful at all. Then she put on a meditation CD and asked me to think a lot about the colour orange. From then on things were good. I felt quite relaxed and given an extra 20 min I would've fallen fast asleep.
I will definitely go again, not sure when though.
The appointment was definitely bittersweet. It started with me giving her our basic TTC back ground. She asked some questions like was I having trouble sleeping, which has been a long standing problem for me. We chatted a bit more then I did this thing where I had to put my hands and bare feet on four metal pad things and two disks on my head attached to wires which in turn was attached to her PC. This was some sort of scan that had something to do with electrical impulses. From this she could pick up anything that wasn't quite right in my body.
The first things she picked up was kidney troubles. She said I was drinking far too little water and was probably dehydrated. Which is so true, I haven't been drinking nearly enough water / liquid for weeks. She noted various levels of certain things and asked me questions:
Do I get angry easily?
Do I get irritated easily?
Do I feel sad?
Do I feel like I've lost my security?
I couldn't believe it! She said all these things, especially the anger, is so built up in me. She asked what I worry about, I told her about my mom and then I mentioned about my dad passing away in the car with me while I drove him to the hospital. And just like that she knew where everything was coming from. She asked if I had had counseling after my dads passing, which I did, but we both agreed that it didn't help all that much (although I did feel a bit better talking about it at the time). My dad was my security, I always knew that if anything happened he would be there for me. That's the bitter part, the talking about him, I still can't talk about what happened that night, sometimes I think about it and it feels like I can't breath and I just pray so hard that that feeling goes away and that my memory of that night fades. All this time I've known that I wasn't the same person as I was before he died but I didn't think it had effected me to this extent.
She said my mind is like a hamster in his wheel, just running like crazy all day. I worry a lot about everything and she picked it up. She also picked up that my breathing is very shallow.
She encouraged me to do yoga, meditation & visualization and breathing exercises to help ease my mind and put me in a better place.
After all that it was time for the needles. I lay down while she inserted needles into my forehead, wrists, stomach, legs and ankles. It was a quick little prick which wasn't painful at all. Then she put on a meditation CD and asked me to think a lot about the colour orange. From then on things were good. I felt quite relaxed and given an extra 20 min I would've fallen fast asleep.
I will definitely go again, not sure when though.
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Tuesday
Tomorrow is IUI # 1. We have to be there at 8:00, luckily not such a severely early morning as the scans. After that I'm going for Acupuncture. I've read so much about it lately and how beneficial it is for fertility. A couple of websites said to start weeks before any actual procedures but I don't see the difference. If this fails then at least I started a month ahead. The Acupuncturist I'm going to has come highly recommended via a local fertility forum and she deals predominantly with fertility issues so I hope she's as good as her reputation allows me to believe. I'm really nervous though, I'm not sure at all what to expect. I know they say it doesn't hurt but knowing my luck I'll jump every time she inserts a needle.
So tonight we'll trigger at 8. 12 Hours later will be IUI # 1 and 36 hours later will be IUI # 2.
My baked goods are selling well for now and tonight I'll be making a big batch of banana muffins to sell tomorrow. I hope they sell well because they're so simple and quick to make.
So tonight we'll trigger at 8. 12 Hours later will be IUI # 1 and 36 hours later will be IUI # 2.
My baked goods are selling well for now and tonight I'll be making a big batch of banana muffins to sell tomorrow. I hope they sell well because they're so simple and quick to make.
Monday, July 5, 2010
Monday
Saturday morning we went for the scan. I was hoping and praying that we would get our doctor to do it and our prayers were answered. The other doctors are fine but they're not as thorough as our doctor (although I hear from a infertility forum that my doctor is less liked for his bedside manner). His findings were ok - two follicles - 10mm and 14mm. I was told to come back today. I got there super early and still had to wait - note to self NEVER go to Vita.lab on a Monday unless absolutely necessary! The scan took 2 min at the most but with all the waiting it was an hour out of my day. Dominant follicle - 17mm, lining 9mm. They gave me Ovi.drel and said to inject tomorrow night between 18:00 and 20:00. I asked to get my proges.terone myself from the pharmacy in order to save some much needed money. I called the pharmacy and they are in fact quite a bit cheaper than the fertility clinic. They now use Utro.gestan which is apparently less messy and gross than Cyclo.gest. Has anybody used it before? Are there any side effects?
I cannot stop looking at baby stuff - linen, cots, diaper bags, clothing, nursery pictures, etc. etc. I'm addicted! When I go into a shop I look at baby goodies before I look at the adult section, that can't be too good! I've bought some things too, not many but a few things. I can't seem to help myself!
I cannot stop looking at baby stuff - linen, cots, diaper bags, clothing, nursery pictures, etc. etc. I'm addicted! When I go into a shop I look at baby goodies before I look at the adult section, that can't be too good! I've bought some things too, not many but a few things. I can't seem to help myself!
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